I was middle school dance nervous the night before visiting my son’s Kindergarten classroom. The plan was for me to read Go, Team Coco!, a book that helps educate young children about type 1 diabetes, to Henry’s class.
I wasn’t nervous about being in a room full of Kindergartners, but I was nervous that after reading a book about diabetes, that some kid would tell Henry what he could or couldn’t eat, would point at his medical devices, that later, in fourth grade, kids might make fun of him, not want to pick him for sports, not invite him to their houses or birthday parties, and hopefully much, much later, not want to date him, or marry him, or hire him, or…
On our walk to school, Henry was excited and asked if I could stay all day. His big sister wanted to know if I could read to her class about diabetes. Truthfully, I didn’t want to read about diabetes at all. I didn’t want to put any fuel on fears for the future, but I sat down at story time and told the class, “One day when Henry was three-years-old he got very sick, but then he got better. He wears a pump and CGM to help us keep him healthy,” and a strange movement caught my eye from the center of the rug, where the kids were seated.
I saw Henry reach into his pocket to get out his pump and show the class. His teacher suggested that he come and sit next to me. With a smile, he joined me in the front of the room. He showed them his pump, (and it’s a really cool pump, by the way, sometimes it turns into a pump laser or a really, really bad disco laser, so Henry says). I read some of the story, and Henry explained what it was like to feel low, when Coco was low. We finished the book and unprompted, the kids all chanted, “Go Team Coco” with me.
And then the hands shot up. I learned which kids have asthma, another kid described how his grandma checks her blood sugar, another kid’s sibling has type 1, another grandparent has diabetes, and another. For a strange moment, diabetes unified a room of Kindergartners, who talked so eagerly, wanting to be part of something by sharing their experience.
As Henry lives with diabetes, I know all his peers won’t accept him as easily as this room full of Kindergartners, but many will.
I tucked the book back in my bag for the short walk home, and it occurred to me that since diabetes takes so much from us there’s no need for me to build straw houses of fear that I’m afraid will burn at some future time. Sometimes, it’s me, and not diabetes that’s the gasoline. In this present moment, none of my fears mattered. My son was a few blocks away, in a room full of curious friends, wearing an awesome pump laser.